Shaking and Breaking Tables: Second Date Edition.

5 reasons the second date never happened. 

Awwww..... I thought we'd be here by now. 😖

How come I never get to the 2nd date part of a relationship?"

1. You never went on a first date. 

Yes, that much is true for some folks.😊

Some people still don't believe going on a date is necessary. As long as i've told you "hey, I like you", and we hangout at my place or yours a few times, or maybe just say hello in the corridor of school/work/church/gym/wherever we meet frequently, we're dating. 🤔

I didn't write this but you know, whoever did has a point. 

While this 'style' might work for some people, this is the exception, not the rule. So if you haven't made obvious steps to show romantic interest, you probably aren't off to a good start.  

Then in a few years, you wake up and ask; where did the butterflies go? They left when you stopped making or (never made) an effort to wow each other REGULARLY. 

2. You left the wrong impression on the first date. Yeah, you heard right. Tho you may want to look at this in more ways than one; 

A. You just weren't their type, and spending time with you made that obvious.

B. You said or did something off putting on the first date! 

So, that person never called back? Or just didn't ask for a second date? Maybe it was something you said or someway you acted?

Yep. Dating has become reaaaallly stressful. 

3. You left the right impression on the first date.

With the wrong person.

I once went on a date with a man who expected me to go home with him afterwards. I put my feet down and insisted he dropped me at my place, and I never heard from him again. 

So why didn't we have a second date? Simple, we had different values and standards, and to him, my standards weren't "worth" his time. 

In a different case, it maybe that they were just sport fishing, and you made it known that you wanted something serious..... And because they're honest people, they decided it best to leave you alone. And that's a good thing. 👌

Appreciate honesty. It's a rare virtue to come by these days. 

4. You never asked for a second date. If he/she liked me, they'll have asked to see me again by now. False. 

If you want to see someone again, regardless of your gender, or how long ago the last outing was; say so. Yes, it works like magic! You should try it. 😉

Don't start a pity party with your girlfriends wondering why he hasn't messaged you after three days 🙄. 

Don't tell your guys about how you might be calling her in a few weeks so you'll look important. 😖

Doooooo iiiiiiiiiit. To start with, you should let them know after the first date that you had a good time and would love to hangout again, but after that day (or night) Call them, text them, just....get in touch. Don't wait for any silly reason. 

5. It just didn't work out. Maybe you were judged quickly, by a person who just couldn't handle your personality, confidence, status, wealth, (or lack of)... Or maybe you had a date on a bad day and you came off as a very different personality. Maybe you got off on the wrong foot with this person and they weren't patient enough to give a second shot.  Or you just weren't meant to be. Nope, not compatible. 

Oh well.... 🤔

We've been led to believe that as long as we're attracted to a person physically, we can make a relationship work with them. False. 

Attraction will fade once a beautiful/handsome person opens their mouth and their speech/mindset doesn't align with your set values. 

In other words, fine boy/fine girl isn't all that's needed for a relationship to work. 

"So what else is there ?" You say. 

I'm pretty/handsome, smart, I have money, good job/education, they should feel lucky to have me! 

Yes, you're all that, but ask yourself; what do you have to offer the relationship apart from beauty, sex, or money? 

If you come up with a good list of credentials that prove your personality to be someone ready to be a partner, then congratulations. Welcome to the love field. 😉 Play your cards wisely and win true love. Who knows? You might even end up with someone you thought you weren't 'compatible' with, if you can find the right 'extension' (what YOU have to offer) to make things work. 

Soooooooo..... has this helped you realise one or two reasons why you might still be single? Or why that 2nd date never happened?

If yes, what steps do you intend to take, going forward?

....What advice would you give to people struggling with starting a committed relationship? 

See you in the comment section.

XoXo; RHD 💜💜💜